Sunday, 17 February 2008

Hype ting

I really hate it when people go righteous on me and get all like 'music isn't a competition you know'. Music is TOTALLY a fucking competition, it's just, for the most part white people just don't seem to have got to grips with the format. Battle of the bands competitions are uniformly shit, X factor is lamentable and TMobile unsigned? Well I guess the fact the series was won by a group of sexless primary school teachers who wouldnt know a good tune if it strolled up and hit them in the face tells you everything you need to know. See the real propblem I have with these shows is the competition is so indirect. Contestants exist in realtive isolation from each other; they do their cover of 'Angels' or whatever then plead open handed and earnest for the judges apporval. In grime, it's not really like that. MC's enter into the competetive spirit with gusto; it's not enough to say 'heres my song, I hope you like it more than the other guys...'
if they think they're better than you they'll write a song about it saying why. If you dont like it then you write a song back, with accompanying threats of violent reprisals. This process works even better in a live format, and doesnt even require the bickering of a couple of closet homo's to spice things up. See below for footage of Lethal B and Wiley on the Young Man Standing set a few years back. Lethal B starts slagging Wiley off live on radio before, seemingly within seconds, Wiley rolls up at the station unannounced with some of his goons, takes a quick puff of a nearby zoot and the 2 go of them go at it. Imagine how amazing it would be if the X Factor auditions were like this? Simon Cowell take note...

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